"You're going to shoot your eye out, kid!"

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.- Mark Twain

I love Mark Twain. He was not only a brilliant writer, but he had a wonderful self deprecating sense of humor. I can identify with that completely---the sense of humor that is.

If you were me, you, too, would have to have a sense of humor. I am notorious for “belly flopping” on “first” attempts. We won’t talk about the first time I drove a car, the first time I skied or the first time I tried parasailing.

Let’s just say that I am not a quick starter in the gate. It takes me a while to warm up to something different, to feel comfortable in a new role, to succeed in my own mind.

The first time I stood up in front of a group of people to give a lecture that I had practiced incessantly and on a topic that I was very familiar with, I felt like the entire Russian army was walking across my tongue in their stocking feet. My manner was stilted, I stuttered and I almost forgot my name.

Other than the physical obstacles that will evaporate (hopefully) with time and practice, I am primarily concerned about making the class enjoyable and comfortable for my colleagues. Horrors! What was I thinking?

I am going to be facilitating for a room of seasoned PROFESSIONALS for Heavens sake, I must have masochistic tendencies that are laughing “themselves” to death in my gut right now!

It ultimately reminds me of one of my favorite Christmas movies, A Christmas Story, when Ralphie is mockingly told, “you’re going to shoot your eye out, kid”!

My fellow classmates are going to be saying, “she couldn’t teach colors to Crayola”.

Now slooooooooow down, I need to turn this thing around. What’s the worst thing that can happen? I can set a judicious example for my colleagues of the mistakes that one can make facilitating. Even at the worst, that does have some merit, doesn’t it? I would be teaching by example, albeit bad example . . . that’s the worst case scenario, right?

Back to Mr. Twain, and I quote, “Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but a cabbage with a college education.” I have to look beyond the risk and focus on the opportunity for training---be that peach, transform into that cauliflower.

After all even if Ralphie was warned that he was “gonna” shoot his eye out, he still had that tremendous passion, took the risk and he only broke his glasses . . . and life went on, right. Life went on.

Ahhhhhhhhh yes, that feels better. Okay, “Throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbor” . . . I have to take that risk, . . . even if I may shoot my eye out!

Piecing Together A MAZE into AMAZE

As I reflect on the second half of the course, I think about all of the new concepts I was exposed to and attempted to assimilate into my realm of understanding.

I had often read wikis, but had never thought of contributing to or creating one. I was not familiar with e-portfolios, although I had been required to create my own webpage before in other classes.

I was overwhelmed and intrigued with all of the dilemmas and ideas that my online classmates brought to the table as many of them strived to reinvent themselves from f2f instructors into online “guide on the side” cyber instructors. Their experiences gave me a better perception of the problems that cyber instructors face as they try to model a virtual class that reaches and is meaningful to as many students as possible.

I struggled with new technologies and contemplated the best approach to each problem as it arose. I was very familiar with being an online student and yet had not attempted many of the new projects that challenged us. How to negotiate the maze? How to master the technologies? I have such a passion for this medium and yet I have so much to learn.

I love the potential of wikis. What a great way to corroborate on and build new bridges of collaborative knowledge. I can see the possibilities for e-portfolios. How many more dimensions can be explored with an e-portfolio as opposed to a paper resume’? It gives each designer the opportunity to continuously improve his/her portfolio through reassessment of where he/she is today as opposed to where they were yesterday. There is also the availability of the use of so many varied mediums to enhance its content, add new dimensional qualities and make it much more interesting and engaging for potential readers.

Maybe that is what I love best about the world Online, the new dimensions that it adds to each of our worlds. Virtual classrooms force us to stretch and to form new dimensions of education. As an instructor, it is no longer enough to be the sage on the stage. It is no longer enough as a student to read a text and regurgitate the content.

There is a huge web of knowledge dangling in front of students in cyberspace and it has many different routes and many different angles. It is up to the cyber instructor to help to create clear maps to help students navigate through the maze.

This body of knowledge is like a huge body of water, constantly moving and changing with immeasurable depth. One can learn to surf the waves and appreciate and respect the depth of the currents or one can be swallowed up by its power.

I think the greatest thing that I have taken away from the second half of this course beyond the teaching and learning principles and the new software is an even deeper appreciation for the power that the Internet has and the power that it has as a potential lifeline of educational advancement for so many.

When Jacque talked about the student who is gaining an education in a rural area in Africa online, my heart leapt at the potential. That is the complex power and the simplicity of the potential this medium holds. It can literally move mountains and open doors for those who have not been able to scale these obstacles in the past. It can bring knowledge to their doorsteps with the simplicity of the click of a button. And that potential is not just a stride for that singular human being, but it is a stride for each and every one of us because their ideas can add to this one giant wiki we all are a part of called humanity.

I hope to improve my skill levels as we move forward into the next class. Hopefully, I will polish the skills I have began to develop and continue to learn how to successfully translate learning into learning and teaching.

This class has been “a maze” but piecing the puzzle together has enabled it to become an “amazing” experience.

The Velveteen Rabbit and How Online Classrooms Become REAL

I just finished reading Margery Williams’ “The Velveteen Rabbit” to my young niece. It is her favorite book and the book like the rabbit in the story is getting pretty shabby, but it is still such a beautiful, meaningful book and just as poignant as the first day that my mother read it to me. As I dim the light the words echo in my mind . . .

“What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?” “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.

It doesn’t happen all at once. You become. It takes a long time. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

What a wonderful story. It is an analogy of how I feel about creating an online classroom. I don’t want it to just contain proper text and content or proper formatting I want it to have personalities and feelings.

In the book, the velveteen rabbit becomes a real living rabbit at the end and visits the boy. I want to do whatever it takes to breathe life into my online classroom so that students enjoy visiting, chatting and freely exchanging thoughts and ideas so that it can become a REAL classroom experience, one that they can refer back to and one that evokes pleasant memories of a relaxed learning environment.

I think this is the single most important and most difficult element of online classrooms to successfully achieve. After you understand that, you must work hard to offer many differently shaded rooms of learning where individual students can walk through and congregate in and get comfortable with the learning style that suits their needs.

You also know that although you must create different opportunities and venues for different learning styles, you must also infuse a spirit into that online classroom that will meld students into a singular REAL unique entity that exhibits a well worn comfortable atmosphere where they feel alive and where communication flows freely and easily.

The perfect REAL online classroom won’t feel forced or stilted, it won’t feel campy or contrived, it will feel natural and easy as the discussions and chat rooms continually generate “AHA” moments and “OH NO” feelings, and comforting reassurance from other students and guidance from encouraging instructors.

But just as the skin horse said, “It doesn’t happen all at once. You become. It takes a long time.”

This is encouraging for a novice like me, because I know that it will take me awhile to be comfortable enough with all of the teaching methods and learning styles for them to become second nature and to not feel manufactured and plastic.

I will have to work hard at making the learning comfortable and inviting to all learners especially those who approach with trepidation.
I always have to remember that every student who enters my online classroom may be coming to my tiny room in cyberspace as a first time online learner.

The atmosphere may be as scary and unfamiliar as that first day of on ground school was for me when everything and everyone seemed so daunting and unfamiliar.

I have to work at creating the same warmth that I felt from the smile of my first on ground teacher as she made me grow and develop a sense of belonging. That is an important part of the online environment---the moment when students realize that they are integral parts of making an online classroom REAL, that they truly belong.

Their foibles, their thoughts not always so gingerly stated, their mistakes, their uniqueness, these things are all part of making it REAL. Imperfection and impatience, excitement and elation, candor and cohesion, small words and big ideas, languish and levity, doubts and dilemmas, missteps and giant leaps---there is room for all of these; in fact they are needed if I am to ever hope to make my online classroom REAL.

I am busy now searching for the right “chairs” that will be comfortable and suitable for all visitors and the right brew that will be inviting to everyone who knocks at the door and enters with a wee bit of reluctance and a dab of fear.

There has to be a big fireplace where people can congregate with others and feel the warmth of the ideas as they are heaped upon the fire to fuel the flame and heat the room. A fire that burns brightly enough to illuminate the room and cast large shadows that will create memories and a valuable learning exchange and with flames that leap and dance excitedly toward the ceiling and draw other students near.

If the elements are right, students will feel comfortable enough to visit often and to take off their coats and sit awhile and exchange ideas and REAL learning will take place. Hopefully they will leave an authentic part of themselves behind when they leave and that part will be valuable to the next learner. Maybe just because of my intense love of learning, it can become REAL for someone else.

I know my online classroom may not be the most elaborate or the most eloquent, it may not have “things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle”, but I hope that the carpet in the entry is well worn and the comfortable chairs show their constant use and may admittedly sometimes appear shabby, because as the skin horse so aptly put it, “But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are REAL you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

Slaying My Demons

“You gain strength, courage and confidence

by every experience in which you really
stop to look fear in the face . .

Do the thing you think
You cannot do.”
Eleanor Roosevelt


This quote has been reverberating through my mind lately. Every time that I cower at the mention of a new skill that I must acquire----every time I tell myself I cannot possibly accomplish what is expected of me----every time I feel that I am not equal to the task at hand, I think of Eleanor Roosevelt and this quote that is indelibly written within the recesses of my brain.

I don’t know if I can meet the challenges of teaching . . .but I can learn. I can learn and I will therefore conquer my fear of teaching.

Although I do not come from a teaching background and the concepts of learning styles and constructivism were new to me I will prevail. Once I took the DVC inventory and learned more about constructivism, I started to innately realize how important they were to learning both on ground and online.

My curiosity was piqued by the different styles and the importance and difficulty of trying to accommodate them in an online learning environment. I quickly realized how difficult it is to create a balance of learning style opportunities that would successfully attract and hold the interest of different learners. I also realized that one had to be reticent of your own learning style so that you do not overshadow your online class with your own preferences in learning.

I had also never thought about instructors having different teaching styles. It seemed like teachers were divided into two camps-good or bad, before I learned that there were different types of teaching styles. I didn’t consider the fact that different teaching styles might not be well suited to different students and their preferences for learning. Some students might prefer a delegator while others prefer their instructor to be primarily an expert to be comfortable.

I came to appreciate through all of our topical discussions that creating a successful online learning environment would be arduous and very time consuming. I also now know that it will be a matter of trial and error. I also know that it will ultimately be an original conceptual design melded by the learners. A good class must have a good solid structure, but it must also be able to incorporate some flexibility to accommodate customization for that particular class blend and the particular chemistry of each group of learners.

I appreciate the fact that the instructor must make the learning environment as comfortable and devoid of foreboding aspects as possible. I realized that a good instructor must have an introductory activity that will engage and encourage students to be self-assured and to become one in the learning environment. He/she must be available for communication daily during the term, so that students do not become discouraged or feel isolated in an online class experience. He must also constantly be measuring the cadence of the class to make sure that he has not fallen out of step with their immediate wants and needs.

I also realized that it was possible to successfully create a small working group of students who can come from totally different academic backgrounds and through the use of online communication mediums like cyber chat rooms and discussion boards meld them into a functioning unit that create a very viable learning tool through cooperation and open communication. I, also, appreciated all of the other groups and the many web sources that I was able to glean from their excellent group presentations.

I appreciated once again the value of an online presentation with an open question and answer platform as I enjoyed the valuable information that Ms. Martin imparted to us about being an online instructor. I was buoyed by the fact that she had not had an on ground teaching background and had even considered that this factor had perhaps been an asset for her as she came to the medium with no preconceived ideas.

I was pleased to hear that as someone who lacked a lot of experience in on ground instruction, I, too, could potentially make lemonade out of what I had previously perceived as lemons. I had been grappling with my shortcomings as I read the experiences of my seasoned classmates and Ms. Martin gave me encouragement to continue to bring my own unique voice to the table.

I also learned how to successfully create a blog. Granted I have a great deal more to learn about bringing this tool to life, but I am enjoying the process. I have already started a blog for our students. At this point, it is just a place for them to find event information, find new vocabulary words, explore interesting new reads, try valuable research websites, express their ideas about past activities and workshops and suggest new activities. However, I will continue to work to improve the content every month, and I am very pleased by the response we have already had from our students and the staff. It has the potential to be another useful communication tool between staff and students.

I have enjoyed reading the vast range of ideas that each student has brought to the dance as we communicate on the discussion boards. It is comforting to hear that others are experiencing the same trials and tribulations that I am.

I have once again been humbled by technology. It can be a valued friend and an unrelenting foe and one must learn to ride the ebbs and flows of the waves and refuse to give in to the foibles that occur. It is damning when you cannot figure the problem out, but it feels so exhilarating when you finally breakthrough, solve the puzzle yourself and can move forward.

Finally we have just started to explore the use of e-portfolios. This is the first time that I have been introduced to this online tool. I can already see some of the possible uses of this new compiler of knowledge and experience. I am once again hesitant as we begin our foray into electronic portfolios. I have already been bolstered by reading about the same fears expressed by my colleagues.

With each new concept, I wonder how I will choose to add that element to my own online class. How will I infuse activities to create camaraderie? Will I be able to touch the minds and hearts of my online learners in this high tech environment? How will I use the group learning concept? How will I assuage the fears of novice online learners? How will I use the chat room, the discussion boards, graphics, audio, video, etc., etc.?

I am comforted by the fact that I have also had my love of online learning expanded. I have always loved the concept and the possibilities, but I have now come to appreciate the vast difference between a well designed web course and a transplanted version of an on ground course that has literally been “plopped” online.

I have taken quite a few online classes and have seen an evolution in the online class environment from a foggy, gray environment consisting mostly of merely taking online exams, submitting online papers and watching uninspired Powerpoint presentations to a much more vivid landscape where live presentations and open live communication have become commonplace.

I also know that a new medium does not go from infancy to maturity overnight. It was a long journey from the first home telephone communication to today’s cell phones. Although I think technology is moving far more rapidly because of our improved means of human communication, I believe that unbelievable advances are always going to be lurking right around the next corner.

I know that no learning environment is best for every student and there will always be room for a variety of venues, however, I am excited to think about the potential scale of this medium. I am excited about the number of human beings who can be reached and the barriers both physical and psychological that can be breached. I am excited to watch things evolve, but most importantly, I am excited about the potential to be a part of this cyber wave into the future. I am excited to continue learning.

I am ruminating over all of this on this crisp Sunday morning as I contemplate what I have already learned in this class. Queries still pervade my consciousness, can I successfully do this, understand that----the questions whiz like a ticker tape through my brain.

More than anything I know I must fortify myself with the thing I am confident I can do---I can learn. And then I must listen to Eleanor’s wisdom, look fear in the face and continue undaunted, “to do the thing I think I cannot do”.

Stymied Again

It's Monday morning, and I am thinking about how I was once again stymied by technology . . .
I attempted to post my blog late last night when the house was quiet and everyone was already fast asleep. No problem, I thought. I had read through the instructions at an earlier time and everything seemed crystal clear. BOY WAS I WRONG.

Let's see, it was enable html, click on the link and add your URL; that seemed simple enough right? Well, when I went through those steps the box didn't come up to allow me to post the URL. Maybe I was going in to the assignment at the wrong spot, Sharon tried to help and suggested I try my link through the calendar. She was the voice of reason and calmness in my ever escalating mindset. I attempted that---still no box.

I read and re-read the instructions. There must be some little nuance that I was doing wrong. I closely examined every little diagram and word in the instructions---I wrote down crib notes because perhaps my brain cells were dying more rapidly than I had imagined.

I tried again and again. No response. I gave my computer a tongue lashing, albeit a whispered one because everyone was sleeping!! What was it's problem?? Didn't it recognize the fact that I WAS doing the instructions right?? My machine was "mum", totally unresponsive---it seemed completely unconcerned with my conundrum. If only it would utter some response, it would give me a reasonable excuse for kicking it, but nothing!

Then suddenly the synapses started sparking in my brain (who knew it worked on Sunday nights?)and I had an ah-ha moment! Somehow, one of the popup blockers had become engaged on my machine, but I had sudddenly realized the problem and it had been thwarted!!

Once again another evil plot by the tiny demons that set up stumbling blocks on my machine in the middle of the night while I am fast asleep had been foiled!! I beamed with wicked satisfaction and shut the machine down for some shuteye.

But as I pulled the blankets up around my neck and peered into the darkness of the bedroom, the thought, however, did enter my mind---perhaps I HAVE been reading a little too much science fiction.